They are supposed to sanction cases of misdemeanor including corruption but Mubende Resident State Attorney Patrick Obbo Oneko, is in court battling charges of soliciting a bribe of Shs500.000.
Obbo Oneko, who was released on a cash bail of Shs1.5 million on May 8, allegedly asked for the money from a one Francis Kituula of Kiganda in Mubende district, in exchange for non-prosecution of the latter’s brother-in-law, Gordon Muwange, who is accused of murder.
The Prosecutor appeared before Grade One Magistrate Susan Okeny of the Anti-corruption Court and denied the charges after which he presented three sureties, who were bonded at a non-cash bond of Shs50 million each.
It is said that on or around April 30 Obbo Oneko of Mubende DPP’s office asked for the said money, which landed him in trouble with the law on May 5, when he was allegedly caught receiving the bribe. He was detained and charges preferred against him vide file number MBD CRB 621/2015.
Mr Yusuf Kiwanda, the Inspectorate of Government (IGG) officer prosecuting the case had earlier sought the leave court to stop Obbo Oneko from accessing his office, a request that was not granted, with the magistrate directing Mr Kiwanda to contact both the DPP and IGG offices for further directions.
However, the suspect was ordered to deposit his passport with court, while the case resumes on May 21.
The former Secretary General of the Uganda Red Cross Society Richard Michael Nataka has regained temporary freedom after the Anti-corruption court released him on cash bail on May 8.
Nataka, who spent the night of May 7 in Luzira, is being charged with two counts of abuse of office, after allegedly evading taxes when he shipped in a luxurious SUV, a Toyota Tundra in 2013, claiming it belonged to the URCS.
The said vehicle allegedly belonged to an individual, and subsequent investigations by URA and other prosecuting agencies landed the former URCS boss into the mess that has culminated in him forfeiting Shs15 as bail.
His sureties; his paternal uncle, Paliisa Resident District Commissioner (RDC) John Nabende, Mr Moses Kigayi, another RDC(Manafwa); Mr James Mayoca, a Principal Economist with the Ministry of Education and businesswoman Stella Watenyeli, were all ordered to execute a non-cash bond of Shs100m each by Grade One Magistrate Agnes Alum.
Earlier, state prosecutor Harriet Angom had opposed Nataka’s bail application, arguing that Nataka the suspect was likely to flee, given that there are three new charges being preferred against him by the Directorate of Public Prosecutions..
But the magistrate dismissed the prosecutor’s arguments on grounds that charges were not sustainable at the point in time because the files have not yet been sanctioned.
Hearing resumes June 24.
It has been a helluva of boring week. We had wanted to enter into Fr Simon Lokodo’s brain and decode what kind of yeast is fermenting cancerous cells in there so that we at least come out and tell some of the oncologists among the doctors being exported what they have failed to diagnose in the caricature of a minister but it proved a tough try. Actually, it would have been easier to get judges to give Frying Pun a unanimous decision win over Floyd Mayweather than to enter Lokodo’s head.
The time we spent trying to figure out how to debug Lokodo only caused us mental overdrive and the result was suffering a writer’s block. With deadline approaching, we decided to send several questions to different persons and see what they would say. Some responded. That is how we managed to beat the deadline with this.
First off was Harry Sagara, aka, Saggy. We hit the son of Nebbi on Facebook, asking the now boring former wacky heartthrob why he has made cigarette inundate his libido so much that the idea of marriage makes him go flabby ‘down there’. “You must be a secondary virgin of so many years since Wacky World died. When do you make your ancestors proud?” we asked.
Saggy ignored the inbox message but after some hours, as if pondering how to respond, he went emotional like an actress who told everyone that her debut role would be in the mega movie premiering only for the cameo role to last just a sub-second. Saggy posted: My mother was a wacky one…. one time I brought her a beautiful Shepherd Puppy. I even got it its litre of milk, to my amazement, she kicked out the puppy, boiled the milk and enjoyed it while quarreling mbu, ‘I am here expecting a grandchild and all you do is bring me a puppy’ Now that she’s gone, I need to achieve her expectations. Let’s make mummy smile in her grave. I need a volunteer to make a kid with…any takers?”
One of Saggy’s Facebook friends, Piga Panga, responded, suggesting Praise Asiimwe would be the perfect volunteer. Saggy and Praise were rumoured to be an item back in the late 2000s when the man was a hit and on heat as a satire columnist. Praise was then still enjoying her moment of popcorn fame as former Miss Uganda and the two were often seen in happening places faking PDA (pubic display of adulthood).
In response, Saggy said what he needs now is not someone who will praise him but one to raise his kid. We have chosen to let Saggy die in his own movie.
Floyd Mayweather
The ‘fight of the century’ took place and there was always going to be one winner: Mayweather. It did not matter how much he was pummeled, he had to win. Memes were flying around mocking how the American spent the whole night ducking, running and hugging Manny Pacquiao and that is what we asked. Why hug your opponent yet he is a former domestic assault convict?
“Winners win, losers give excuses,” Mayweather said in his response. “In any case, if I hugged Manny, it is because boxing is like politics; it has no permanent enemies. We can even punch in pre-fight, during weigh-in and so on, but in the ring, the animosity has to end, it becomes a sport and friendship.”
We are not sure who wrote the response because Mayweather can neither read nor write. However, the email was clean with no grammatical mistakes.
“In the sweet science of boxing, it is okay to punch your ex-wife. You know why? Money. It’s all about money. Manny was the reason I was earning $14 million every twelve minutes and a woman is the reason you will lose $25 million in just a single court order. Would you rather hug the bitch or hug Manny? Yes, I ran, I ducked, I hugged Manny and got paid. If I hugged a woman, she gets ideas, ideas for my money. I don’t joke around when it comes to money. My world is about money. It’s money for The Money Team or nothing.”
We were too dumbfounded to write back.
Pierre Nkurunziza
Pierre Nkurunziza
The East African region has Letter K. From Kigali to Kinshasa, back to Kampala and to Kidodoma through Kisumu, everything is about Kenyatta, Kaguta, Kikwete, Kagame and Kiir. But some fluker called Pierre Nkurunziza of Burundi is a very black pea in a white pod. No wonder you will find him playing football surrounded by mean-looking guards while on the streets, citizens are being beaten to death by policemen for protesting. And after his game of soccer, this chap will go and announce that he is running for a sad term in office to prolong the sadness of the Burundians.
We asked him why. He had this to say.
“I am just not ready to leave. Besides, in African politics, when the people vote for you, you lose. There are a few exceptions, of course, but mango people in a typical banana republic vote using a mirror so that the reflection is actually what they mean. So when they go on streets and have themselves used as experiments to test our rifles, then it means they are urging me to stay on. I would be worried if all of them wanted me to stay for five more terms.”
Adbayor
Adebayor’s family
Alive Hajia Emiola Adebayor is a mother from hell. Togolese soccer star Emmanuel Adebayor calls her mother, but we choose to differ. There is need for a DNA test. Emiola and her other ‘real’ children have been turning Ade into an ATM. They want monthly salary. So we tried to contact her.
“No comment. Absolutely no comment. I can’t talk about that monkey, a monkey is not my child. We have absolutely disowned him. Let him live in his money… alone. Absolutely alone.”
David Cameron has retained his job as UK prime Minister after his Conservative Party carried the day in an election that has several big names as casualties.
Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg of the Liberal Democratic Party (Lib Dems) and Labour leader Ed Miliband are the biggest losers in the polls that were won by the Conservatives with 326 seats, followed by Labour with 230 seats; the Scottish National Party (SNP) 56 seats; Liberal Democrats 8 seats, the Democratic Unionist Party (DUP) 8 seats, while the UK Independence Party (UKIP), whose leader Nigel Farage lost his Thanet South constituency, managed only one seat.
Miliband and Clegg have already resigned their party posts, while Lib Dems Vince Cable, a Business, Innovation and Skills Secretary also lost his Twickenham seat.
Meanwhile, Prime Minister-elect Cameron has already met with Queen Elizabeth II and returned to his official residence at 10 Downing Street.
Vision group’s grip on Uganda as dominant media platform is under threat as Nation Media Group’s NTV is set to launch their Luganda station to counter Vision group’s Bukedde TV.
Reliable sources indicate that NTV boss Aggie Konde is under pressure to maintain the Serena based TV as a number one station but stress from Bukedde’s influence as the number one Luganda station had earlier on forced NTV to bend on the NMG strict ‘anti-riffraff’ editorial policy, to begin some programmes like Mwasuze Mutya and the Omumuli.
TO CHAIR NAIROBI SITTINGS: EALA Speaker Dan Fred Kidega.
Dan Fred Kidega Speaker EALA
The East African Legislative Assembly is set to debate the Budget Speech, a key activity for the legislative arm of the East African Community.
According to a communiqué released on May 6, the 12-day plenary session in Arusha, Tanzania, to be held between May 10 and May 22 will be presided over by the EALA Speaker Dan Fred Kidega, while the Speech, expected on May 14 will be delivered by the chairman of the EAC Council of Ministers Dr. Harrison Mwakyembe.
In June last year EALA approved US$124,216,995 for FY 2014/15 and prioritized the operationalization of the Single Customs Territory (SCT); implementation of the Common Market Protocol and the implementation of the bloc’s industrialisation policy, among other issues.
In January this year EALA approved a supplementary budget of US$2,040,520 to cater for among other activities, elections in the region, food balance, and the strengthening of the community’s African Growth and Opportunity Act (Agoa) interventions. Other areas that received supplementary budgetary interventions included HIV/Aids, EAC Vision 2050 and the e-Passport, bringing the total amount to US$126,257,515.
In a related development, EALA will also debate the EAC Creative and Cultural Industries Bill, 2015 and the EAC Electronic Transactions Bill, 2014.
‘Creative and cultural industries are considered one of the fastest growing sectors in the global economy and contribute significantly to the Gross Domestic Product (GDP) of many developed and developing countries. The object of the Bill is to promote the creative and cultural industries at the EAC’ the communiqué reads in part.
The bill, sponsored by Rwanda’s EALA MP Dr. James Ndahiro seeks to establish the Creative and Cultural Industries Council, a body that will oversee the innovations, coupled with skills training and policy formulation, among other functions.
Other reports expected to be debated include: the rights of children in the community; the 2nd Lake Victoria Water Supply and Sanitation Programme, and the State of EAC Address which was delivered on March 19th, in Bujumbura, Burundi, by President Jakaya Mrisho Kikwete of Tanzania, who is also the Chairperson of the Summit of EAC Heads of State.
At its last sitting in Bujumbura EALA passed three Bills namely: the EAC Customs (Amendment) Bill 2015; the EAC Elimination of Non-Tariff Barriers Bill, 2015 and the EAC Civic Education for Integration Bill, 2015.
Uganda Beach Volleyball Team (Red) set for qualifiers
Uganda Beach Volleyball Team (Red) set for qualifiers
Uganda will have its last shot at qualifying for the September All Africa Games as the Women Beach Volleyball Qualifiers serve off in Mombasa Kenya this weekend.
Youngsters Faith Magole and Ester Tumwebaze were selected as a fallback position for the Beach Council after the squad that had been prepared became incomplete on the final day.
The Beach Council had selected Amuron Eunice to pair with Peace Busingye since her partner Alupo Christine was still injured.
However, the Council was shocked with a last minute apology from Amuron not making the Mombasa trip after confirming earlier and attending training sessions with her partner.
Efforts to get an emergency replacement for her were futile as everyone contacted declined citing short notice and commitments.
The Beach Council eventually broke through when they secured the entries of the former U-19 pair of Faith and Ester who both feature for UCU Volleyball Club.
Mofaht Masaba confirmed that the pair had safely arrived in Mombasa this afternoon (Friday).
Uganda just has to tussle it out with hosts Kenya and neighbours Tanzania with the top two finishers qualifying for the Finals in Congo Brazzaville.
The men failed to qualify when Nicholas Dheyongera and Malinga Kathbart during the Dar es Salaam qualifiers last month.
As part of its business realignment strategy, leading global energy management experts and manufacturers Royal Philips diversified its investment portfolio, turned to healthcare services, with special focus on Africa.
According to the 123-year old company, under HealthTech, the health services business arm, the company identified oral healthcare, informatics, ultrasound diagnostics, cardiac care and home healthcare as some of the core areas of investment.
Indeed, in the last five years the company has played a significant part in healthcare delivery services in Africa, among them sponsoring the Cape Town to Cairo roadshow, an annual event. This year’s caravan, to be launched on May 11 in Cape Town, South Africa, is themed on reducing child mortality rates and improving maternal health as part of the efforts to strengthen the realization of the Millennium Development Goals (MDGs) and Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs) across Africa.
“We have learned an enormous amount, our focus has not wavered, and we will continue to play an integral role in the development of Africa. We are hugely excited about the 2015 roadshow, and we look forward to launching even greater innovations, products and partnerships that precisely address and get to the heart of Africa’s needs,” JJ Van Dongen, Senior Vice President and CEO Philips Africa, is quoted saying.
The 12.000km – four month journey dubbed the C2C, will see the caravan go through eight African states and 11 cities including Nairobi and Addis Ababa in East Africa and the Horn of Africa, respectively. It will end in Cairo in October.
‘Over the past five years the roadshow has championed the UN Millennium Development Goals 4 and 5, registering success in the health sector areas such as Mother and Child care and focus on non-communicable diseases,’ a communiqué issued on May 5, states.
Royal Philips, a multi-billion Dutch company with a background in energy including LED and solar lighting, prioritized its healthcare arm, with emphasis on revitalizing healthcare in Africa by also focusing on clinical education and training of health service providers, with 3,100 personnel across the continent benefitting from the initiatives.
Over the years Africa has engendered slow progress in the realization of the MDGs and it is said that most countries including Uganda will not be able to meet the set UN MDG targets by June this year.
According to the UNDP, by 2013 Uganda had already met two of its 17 targets – halving the number of people living in absolute poverty and achieving debt sustainability – and was on course to meet another eight.
Maroons Football Club returned to Uganda’s top-tier League, Uganda Premier League (UPL) alongside The Saints with direct qualification from the Big League.
The two clubs toppled their respective groups (Rwenzori and Elgon) after Thursdays’ final day fixtures.
The Saints F.C edged Jinja Municipal Council 1-0 at the Nelson Mandela National stadium, to finish top of Rwenzori group, while Maroons also picked a narrow 0-1 away (in Masaka) against Synergy FC.
Ssali Musa scored the all-important goal on 22minutes for Coach Asaph Mwebaze side, who was a delighted man after the game.
‘My players got the result we were looking for but the pressure was on us to win and qualify. We are very happy to be back in the top flight’ said Mwebaze.
The Saints scored through lead striker, Alex Kitata
The battle now awaits a third side that will be decided via play offs, starting Wednesday 13th May 2015.
In 2011, thousands of Ugandans herded the Kyambogo rugby grounds with a vengeance for doing battle. On reaching the venue, they found a temporary fence that had divided the pitch into two sections. You see, a very serious and bloody battle was to be fought that day so one had to choose on which side of the face they fell. The two groups of imbeciles hurled insults at each other as they waited for their warlords to take centre stage.
Later, singers Bebe Cool and Bobi Wine took to the stage and performed a few songs, praised their fans (each saying his are the best) while the fans in the two warring clusters categorically expressed their dumbness by worshipping the artistes. Each group now felt empowered to hate the other.
So, as the money makers used their talent to get what they wanted, their devoted fans hurled insults at each other as if any of the two would buy them a bottle of beer. Sheer madness!
When the “musical battle” ended, the fans went back to their muzigos and, in the morning, had to use the back window so as to avoid being seen by their landlords who they now owe two months rent.
The singers that they were worshiping the previous night were laughing on their way to the bank. Don’t believe me? You clearly haven’t been to Bobi Wine’s One Love Beach in Busabala.
Any way, let us fast forward to 2015. Yes, this year too, on May 10th, these ‘music generals’ will be bagging enough to feed twenty families for up to six months as thousands of Ugandans will flood Lido Beach, pay ten thousand shillings to watch the mouse and cat players; Jose Chameleone, Bobi Wine and Bebe Cool.
In what they have called ‘Uganda’s Finest’, the trio, who have for long been on and off sworn enemies will perform on the same stage, with their dimwit supporters bickering over who is ‘greater’. Really, for how long will these musicians flourish on our dumbness?
These guys have ‘beefed’ on all possible mediums; music, television shows, radio talk shows and even newspapers. They have successfully managed to create the illusion that they can never cross each other’s paths because of their sworn hatred, probably arising from competition for money and fame. Unfortunately, people will not realise that that is all there is to this madness. A mere illusion!
It breaks my heart to know that the same will happen this Sunday.
Perhaps we need another rap by Sheikh Nuhu Muzaata. “Nne ntunulira embuzi zino nengamba UPE yatusala!”
