Bugweri County MP Abdu Katuntu
Bugweri County MP Abdu Katuntu

“This Musoga lawyer will leave a mark on the history of investigations carried out by the Parliament of Uganda, and I think this time round he will help expose the irregularities in the oil sector. I also think that at one time in future he could become the first Musoga to have real presidential prospects if politics in this country somehow changes,” Kamadhi said, just after taking his now traditional seat next to Gaudensia Mbaroraburora, aka Club Belle.

But as usual, Yorokamu Bwambale shot up, saying he was not taking Kamadhi’s ‘lies while sitting down’. “Who is that you are talking about? Abdu Katuntu? I don’t see that (leading Uganda) happening anytime in the near future; has he ever held a gun or even gone to Kyankwanzi?” Bwambale, the cool-headed but obstinate man from the Rwenzori region asked, adding: “I think Katuntu is just like his other learned friend, retired Justice James Ogoola Munnange, whose biggest contribution to Uganda is finding comfort under his bed!”

However, Kamadhi insisted ‘Katuntu’s qualities make him stand out as one of the few nationalists and patriots capable of defending the interests of Uganda’.

Officials of some Chinese construction companies appearing before COSASE led by Bugweri MP Abdu Katuntu

“You know Katuntu heads the committee that oversees Statutory Agencies like Uganda Revenue Authority and Uganda National Roads Authority and just recently he managed to expose a rip-off of over 30 billion shillings by some shadowy Chinese road construction firm, reportedly authorized by one of the beneficiaries of the handshake. The committee is called COSASE,” Kamadhi said, adding that Katuntu had been assigned another task that links him directly to defending the interests of Uganda.

“You wait it is going to be fire in Parliament; do you know Abdu Katuntu? Don’t you know that the Speaker who, I must proudly say is also a Musoga, has asked him to lead the investigations into the presidential handshake in which 6 billion shillings was shared out by just 42 senior government officials? Ask the top executive of the Uganda National Roads Authority,” Kamadhi said, before delving into details about the money which, he said, had accrued from a ‘Capital Gains Tax’ case reportedly won by the said officials against two oil firms, Heritage Oil and Gas and Tullow Oil.

“Anyway, isn’t it ironic that just a few months after the President giving the so-called patriotic Ugandans that humongous reward, one of them gets involved in the Shs30 billion scam and ‘apologises to Ugandans’; another who heads the revenue collection body fails to ensure that the set target is less by a whooping Shs200 billion, while yet several others who work both in the Attorney General’s chambers and the Solicitor General’s Office had to be reminded to file submissions for defence at the International Court of Justice in a case in which Uganda could lose 10 billion dollars to the Democratic Republic of Congo, for acts of plunder reportedly committed by Ugandan senior military officials in the DRC in the 2000s?” ‘Insect Professor’ Maurice Ogeng Ladit, asked.

“By the way I hear the person who rewarded our so-called gallant Ugandans called the ruling party caucus to justify the payments but it seems all did not go as expected and that is how the Parliament now comes in to carry out the investigation,” Prof. Ogeng said, adding: “This is the first time such a thing is happening but trust the person who gave the reward, he eventually advised the caucus members on the parameters the investigation should focus on!” The good old Professor even wondered whether the money won had actually reached the state coffers.

“You see, I heard that the portion that remained after the sharing out was used on Karuma Hydropower Dam, but that is strange given that the construction of the dam started years ago yet the money won is a yesteryear issue,” Prof Ogeng, the most educated member of the group alongside lawyer Rebecca Kagada, said.

Lawyer Kagada aka Rebecca K, who incidentally also hails from Kamuli in Busoga, then weighed in on the discussion, saying she trusted her ‘colleague lawyer’ Katuntu to do a good job.

“Like Kamadhi said, counsel Katuntu helped us expose some of these thieves, some of who pass of as born-again Christians,” Rebecca K, known for her acerbic tongue, went off.

Rebecca K added: “It is a shame that the names of these so-called born again women who head very powerful government institutions are cropping up in almost all scams we are witnessing in the country; I think in future, in order to deter such spiteful persons from occupying public office, they should also be subject to parliamentary approval.”

It was at that moment that an anchor read news about embattled President Yahaya Jammeh of The Gambia, drawing the attention of club members to the radio.

“You mean that man is still the President?” Hitler Eregu, the former rebel-turned-ruling party supporter, asked. “I thought he had been flushed out by now,” he added.

Then Kamadhi joined in, giving a lengthy history of Jammeh and how he had ‘ruined Gambia, a formerly very good tourism destination’.

“The man is a dictator per excellence, even after 22 years as president, presiding over a poverty-stricken population, he doesn’t see reason to leave the stage for another person to try and correct his errors,” Kamadhi said, adding: “I just can’t help imagine that his country has a population of only two million people and that they are very poor.”

“Anyway, at any rate Jammeh is going because all the relevant regional and global authorities including the Security Council have abandoned him; that makes the continent one dictator less,” Insect Professor Ogeng Ladit said, sheepishly looking at Kamadhi.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Kamadhi asked before the Professor and other members of the group bust out laughing.

“Are there some other dictators on the continent?” Kamadhi asked, before declaring his intention to “go home early today and wait for what my ‘brother Katuntu’ will unearth in the two-month investigation.”

Kamadhi then walked off, closely followed by Mbaroraburora aka Club Belle, raising suspicion of a developing relationship between the two. Next to leave was Insect Professor Ogeng Ladit, in the company of lawyer Rebecca K, who both declared they were out for ‘a frothy one’.

Chairman Akalyamaggwa Bonnabagaga, who had all along had little contribution to debate, wished us all a ‘goodnight’.